The Preemie Clothes
No mother ever wants to buy these – the preemie clothes.
No mother ever plans to buy them and have them stashed away for “just in case.”
And yet, when you need preemie clothes, they are impossible to find with only a few, select stores carrying them.
When your water breaks suddenly or your blood pressure rises to a dangerous level, it’s not according to plan.
We make these birthing plans and have this picture in our minds of who will be in the room, if I’ll use pain meds or not, what playlist of soothing music I’ll listen to, and so on.
But sometimes it doesn’t go as planned. Whether it’s a premature birth or an emergency C-section.
But you know what, mama? It may not be your plan, but it is a part of a plan for you. It may feel unfair and “why me?”. It will make you feel angry as you watch your little angel suffer or gain their wings. It may scare you as you wonder if your little one will be okay or if your own life is in danger. It will probably make you frustrated at your own body and its inability to carry your baby to term. But it’s all a part of a plan, just not your plan.
I know for me, if my water hadn’t broke unexpectedly, four weeks early, I wouldn’t have gone to the hospital and learned that my blood pressure was at a hypertensive crisis level and that I had developed preeclampsia. I would’ve gone to work that day, not knowing what my body was doing until I was at a point of possible distress.
But God. Oh friends, God was looking out for me that day.
Sure, I was afraid that my baby was so early, so tiny. Sure, I was scared as the nurse wouldn’t tell me what my blood pressure was because she was afraid it would stress me out more. Sure, I was terrified as they hooked me up to oxygen because my baby’s heart rate had dropped or when they took him away from me too soon because he wasn’t crying.
The birth of my first child did not go as I planned. And I’m a planner. I’m a list maker. So you can imagine how much it bothers me when things don’t go as planned. But that day taught me to expect the unexpected and just trust His plan.
So mama, if you’re disappointed in your birth experience or you’re currently in the NICU with your little one, just remember, this all may not be according to your plan but it’s exactly according to His plan.
He’s watching out.
